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Adult attachment, stress, and romantic relationships
Open accessAbstract
In this article, we discuss theory and research on how individuals who have insecure adult romantic attachment orientations typically think, feel, and behave when they or their romantic partners encounter certain types of chronic or acute stress. We first review basic principles of attachment theory and then discuss how two forms of attachment insecurity-anxiety and avoidance-are associated with unique patterns of emotion regulation in response to certain types of threatening/distressing situations. We then discuss a diathesis-stress process model that has guided our research, highlighting studies that provide support for certain pathways of the model.
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“Secure attachment is linked to higher trust and responsibility (Simpson & Rholes, 2017), better intimacy (Pielage, Luteijn, & Arrindell, 2005), elevated selfconfidence, better communication skills (Guerrero, 1996), and a higher tendency for selfdisclosure (Sampthirao, 2016).”
From THE ROLE OF INTIMACY, BELONGING, SELF-ESTEEM INTHE ASSOCIATION BETWEEN ANXIOUS, AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT AND FORGIVENESS AMONG MARRIED IRANIAN WOMEN (2021) · cites this paper as Simpson & Rholes, 2017
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“Rumination is associated with negative emotional experiences in relationships [19], challenges resolving conflict [22], and increased rates of emotional distress and psychopathology [21].”
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InfluentialGácsi, M., Miklósi, Á., & Topál, J. (2023) · Ecology and Evolution · doi:10.1002/ece3.10514 · Cited by 7
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BackgroundAttachment security, divorce, parental estrangement, and reconciliation
Coleman, J., Cowan, P. A., & Cowan, C. P. (2021) · Journal of Social and Personal Relationships · doi:10.1177/02654075211046305 · Cited by 6
“Secure attachment is predicated on the expectation that an individual will be protected and comforted when threatened by the actual or potential loss of a primary attachment figure and be better equipped to cope with threats and losses when they occur (Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
BackgroundKurbatfinski, S., Letourneau, N. L., Dewey, D., Hayes, A. F., Hayden, A., Anis, L., & Dosani, A. (2023) · Clinical Medicine Insights Psychiatry · doi:10.1177/11795573231212175 · Cited by 6
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The Role of Early Adaptive Schemas in Heterosexual Romantic Relationships
Sundgren, M., & Allen, A. (2022) · Sexuality & Culture · doi:10.1007/s12119-022-10018-2 · Cited by 8
“Developing a secure attachment with a spouse appears to provide an emotional regulatory system (Simpson & Rholes, 2017), as individuals seek proximity and comfort from their spouse when experiencing distress, and in turn, receive support to facilitate coping and alleviate distress (Pietromonaco &…”
BackgroundGreen, F. L. L., & Binfet, J.-T. (2023) · Emerging Adulthood · doi:10.1177/21676968231188754 · Cited by 6
Support Processes Predict Declines in Attachment Avoidance Across the Transition to Parenthood
Rholes, W. S., Eller, J., Simpson, J. A., & Arriaga, X. B. (2020) · Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin · doi:10.1177/0146167220960365 · Cited by 6
“It is important to note, however, that the transition to parenthood is different for the two genders in that men are more strongly affected by both positive and negative events than women (e.g., Nelson-Coffey et al., 2019; Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
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Conceptual approaches to studying interpersonal emotion dynamics
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Guo, H., Zhu, Q., Zhong, Y., & Huang, W. (2026) · Frontiers in Psychology · doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2026.1749281 · Cited by 6
“This dimension captures positive internal working models of others and confidence in relationships as sources of safety and support, characteristics that facilitate the development and maintenance of meaningful social connections (Simpson and Rholes, 2017).”
Miscioscia, M., Carli, P. D., Sacchi, C., Tasker, F., & Simonelli, A. (2021) · Springer eBooks · doi:10.1007/978-3-030-51988-9_8 · Cited by 5
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“One possible explanation for the consistent finding is that people with secure attachment experience positive and healthy interpersonal relationships that include trust, reciprocal sharing, and mutual support (Karapınar, 2015; Leiter et al., 2015; Simpson and Rholes 2017).”
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Richards, D. A., Albert, L. S., & Schat, A. C. H. (2023) · Personnel Review · doi:10.1108/pr-08-2022-0537 · Cited by 5
Khattar, V., Huete-Alcocer, N., & Navarro, R. (2023) · BMC Psychology · doi:10.1186/s40359-023-01404-y · Cited by 5
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“Self-reliance functions as a strategy for stress management and control (Simpson & Rholes, 2017) and is evident in the negative attitude toward seeking help and the inclination to avoid support, characteristics associated with attachment avoidance (Gillath et al., 2006; Lopez et al., 1998; Vogel &…”
Maternal Emotional Health Before and After Birth Matters
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“For example, the attachment system is theorized to be activated in times of negative relational events (Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
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“Attachment avoidance reflects the degree to which individuals feel uncomfortable with closeness and emotional intimacy, whereas attachment anxiety reflects the extent to which individuals fear being underappreciated or abandoned by their partner [20].”
Beyond Good or Bad: The Four Evaluative Quadrants of Relationships
Righetti, F., Đurić, M., & Schneider, I. K. (2024) · Personality and Social Psychology Review · doi:10.1177/10888683241302247 · Cited by 4
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“Adult romantic attachment styles indicate a reciprocal relationship between trust, availability, and responsiveness in adult partner relationships (Hazan & Shaver, 1987; Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
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Diabetes stress contagion among romantic partners: a daily diary investigation
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“In general, their behavior in relationships is often described as dysfunctional (Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
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“These beliefs persist into adulthood and establish a prototype for more conflicted relationships (Doyle & Cicchetti, 2017), fail to buffer stress effectively (Simpson & Steven Rholes, 2017), and enhance vulnerability to psychopathology via dysfunctional cognitions (e.g.”
BackgroundFamilies in Eating Disorders: An Attachment Perspective
Monteleone, A. M. (2023) · Springer eBooks · doi:10.1007/978-3-030-97416-9_80-1 · Cited by 4
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“The use of hyperactivation strategies is related to (1) hypersensitivity (exaggerated level of emotional experience, transferring attention from the problem to exaggerated emotions); (2) inaccurate assessments (low self-esteem, perception of the partner as being insufficiently supportive and the situation as exceeding…”
BackgroundInfluentialRepresentações sociais de violência no namoro em adolescentes: uma revisão sistemática
Herculan, M. A. F. C., de Sousa, A. A. S., Sousa, C. M. S., Gurgel, L. C., Cordeiro, A. D. A., Lima, M. N. C. F. D., Pimentel, M. Z. C. F., Herculano, G. M. C., de Santana, W. J., & Luz, D. C. R. P. (2020) · Revista Eletrônica Acervo Saúde · doi:10.25248/reas.e3260.2020 · Cited by 4
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“…of negative internal working models in the aftermath of interpersonal trauma, which can shape one ’ s perceptions of others ’ behaviors in adulthood (Baugh et al., 2019; Simpson & Rholes, 2017) and compromise the acquisition of optimal interpersonal skills (Dion et al., 2019; Godbout et al., 2019).”
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Individual Differences in Romantic Attachment
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“…avoidance are associated with adolescents’ and adults’ emotional regulation (Eilert & Buchheim, 2023; Mikulincer & Shaver, 2019), physical and mental health (Eisma et al., 2023), and relationship satisfaction (such as romantic relationships) (Candel & Turliuc, 2019; Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
Grieving Process Models and Theories
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Self-citationRomantic attachment and support adequacy in new mothers
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“This is in line with previous research which identifies that individuals high in attachment anxiety desire support and assistance from their partner but use ineffective coping strategies and support-seeking behaviors to elicit this care (Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
BackgroundResultFour’s a Crowd? Attachment Styles in Childless Women and First-Time Mothers Toward Their Pet Dog
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“In doing so, other relationship roles within the family are also renegotiated (Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
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“This could be attributed to survivors’ tendencies to have conflicting needs for both connection and isolation as they attempt to avoid distress and cope with trauma symptoms and related difficulties (e.g., distrusting others) (Ruhlmann et al., 2018; Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
InfluentialWalls, K. L., March, E., & Marrington, J. Z. (2024) · Journal of Family Violence · doi:10.1007/s10896-024-00784-y · Cited by 4
“Further, those with attachment-related avoidance often maintain control and autonomy in their relationships by suppressing their own emotions (Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
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“This leads them to obsessively pursue their partner’s love and approval, becoming highly distressed during relationship threats, such as major conflicts or perceived lack of support (Evraire et al., 2022; Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
Meta-Analyzing People’s Self-Disclosure of Sexual Information to Romantic Partners
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“Similarly, higher attachment avoidance was negatively correlated with sexual self-disclosure, reflecting the suppression of intimacy and vulnerability that are defining features of attachment avoidance (Bradford et al., 2002; Mikulincer & Shaver, 2003; Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
Haverkamp, E., Olsman, E., Ćurĉić‐Blake, B., Ramírez, V. V., Aleman, A., Ket, J. C. F., & Schaap‐Jonker, H. (2025) · Frontiers in Psychology · doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2025.1569514 · Cited by 6
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“Attachment theory has been used to better understand relationship dynamics and their associated consequences for individuals (Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
Childhood Adversity and its Echoes in Adult Intimate Relationships
Jain, A., & Tomar, S. (2025) · doi:10.38124/ijisrt/25jul1207 · Cited by 2
van der Watt, A. S. J., Kidd, M., Scheffler, F., Roos, A., Lesch, E., & Seedat, S. (2025) · Current Psychology · doi:10.1007/s12144-025-08368-9 · Cited by 3
Tiwari, S., & Woodward, A. J. (2025) · Contemporary Family Therapy · doi:10.1007/s10591-025-09764-w · Cited by 2
“…illustrates how the coping strategies developed in response to early care-giving roles, although effective in safeguarding emotional well-being, may inadvertently impede relational fulfilment and intimacy (Simpson & Rholes, 2017 ), highlighting the long-term social costs of parentification.”
Modern Love: You, Me, and Smartphone Makes Three
Garris, B. R. (2020) · Marriage & Family Review · doi:10.1080/01494929.2020.1712574 · Cited by 3
“Thus, relationships can contain a powerful allure and a simultaneously vexing threat (Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
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“It could be conceived that despite their downregulating strategies, avoidant individuals still experience more stress (Simpson & Rholes, 2017) which could lead to worse health (O’Connor et al., 2021) and more negative health evaluations.”
Relationship closeness as a protective factor against the sensitizing effect of adversity history
Duong, J. B., Carta, K. E., Walters, S. N., Fiallo, N. S., Benamu, D. I., Jumonville, G. A., Han, S. C., Kim, Y., Margolin, G., & Timmons, A. C. (2023) · Journal of Social and Personal Relationships · doi:10.1177/02654075231185043 · Cited by 2
“Moreover, the Attachment Diathesis-Stress Model posits that different forms of relationship attachments are uniquely associated with varying patterns of emotion regulation in response to distressing situations (Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
BackgroundAdult Attachment Styles and Conflict Resolution Strategies Among Romantic Relationships
Sarkar, A., & G, V. B. K. (2024) · International Journal for Research in Applied Science and Engineering Technology · doi:10.22214/ijraset.2024.60135 · Cited by 2
When foundations falter: The emergence of defensive narratives from insecure attachment dynamics
Richardson, E. N., & Boag, S. (2024) · Theory & Psychology · doi:10.1177/09593543241270932 · Cited by 2
“Given that attachment working models are related to how individuals perceive and manage stressors, they are implicated in the dynamics of defensive responses (Ein-Dor et al., 2011a; Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
Client characteristics and early working alliance development: A person-centered research approach
Trusty, W. T., Castonguay, L. G., Chun-Kennedy, C. L., Magruder, S. A. N., Janis, R. A., Davis, K. A., Augustin, D. C., & Scofield, B. E. (2024) · Psychotherapy Research · doi:10.1080/10503307.2024.2418868 · Cited by 2
“For example, research on adult attachment suggests that problematic interpersonal patterns develop from past relationship experiences and become most evident when insecurely attached individuals experience high distress (Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
Attachment Style, Task Difficulty, and Feedback Type: Effects on Cognitive Load
Mizrahi, D., Laufer, I., & Zuckerman, I. (2025) · Behavioral Sciences · doi:10.3390/bs15040427 · Cited by 3
“Second, while the use of EEG-based measures of cognitive load was insightful, it may have missed other valuable physiological and behavioral indicators (Ahmadi et al., 2024; Gokay et al., 2015; Macatee et al., 2017; Mather & Thayer, 2018; Zhu et al., 2019).”
Gallistl, M., Hamann, J., Croy, I., Vrtička, P., & Engert, V. (2025) · Social Science & Medicine · doi:10.1016/j.socscimed.2025.118275 · Cited by 2
The Relational Impact of Mindfulness Through the Lens of the MIRROR Model
Karremans, J. C., van der Schans, K. L., & Leavitt, C. E. (2025) · Springer eBooks · doi:10.1007/978-3-031-91451-5_13 · Cited by 2
WHAT PSYCHOSOCIAL FACTORS ARE ASSOCIATED WITH HIV TESTING?
Martins, A., Chaves, C., Canavarro, M. C., & Pereira, M. (2018) · Psicologia Saúde & Doenças · doi:10.15309/18psd190102 · Cited by 2
Boon, S. D., & Holmgren, J. A. (2018) · Journal of Social and Personal Relationships · doi:10.1177/0265407518815774 · Cited by 2
“For example, recent theorizing (Simpson & Rholes, 2017) suggests that attachment processes may predispose individuals to respond to stressors—perhaps including chronic disease—in maladaptive ways.”
BackgroundCauses and Implications of the Opioid Crisis in Rural America
Rivas, B. A., & Rivas, A. L. (2020) · Advances in human services and public health (AHSPH) book series · doi:10.4018/978-1-7998-2787-0.ch003 · Cited by 2
Discuss the Impact of Exposure to Domestic Violence on Children’s Attachment Relationships
Hou, B. (2020) · International Conference on Modern Management and Education Technology (MMET) · doi:10.2991/assehr.k.201023.020 · Cited by 2
Relationships, health, and stress: Validation of a relationship sense of coherence measure
Davis, B. A., Shrout, M. R., Evans, W. P., & Weigel, D. J. (2020) · Personal Relationships · doi:10.1111/pere.12358 · Cited by 2
Eder, S. J., Stefańczyk, M., Pieniak, M., Molina, J. M., Binter, J., Pešout, O., Smela, P., Scharnowski, F., & Steyrl, D. (2020) · Human Ethology · doi:10.22330/he/35/122-136 · Cited by 2
Calkins, F. C., & Brock, R. L. (2021) · Journal of Marriage and the Family · doi:10.1111/jomf.12806 · Cited by 2
I’ll Be There for You: Couples’ Support Providing and Seeking Behaviors in a Stressful Situation
Azzi, S., Lafontaine, M., & Péloquin, K. (2022) · Marriage & Family Review · doi:10.1080/01494929.2022.2025511 · Cited by 2
“However, research using attachment theory as a framework suggests that dispositional romantic attachment and caregiving may influence each partner’s situational responses to one another in stressful contexts (Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
BackgroundBougar, M. R., Nourimoghadam, S., Soroushvala, A., Khodarahimi, S., Abdi, M., Sadeghi, M., & Mazraeh, N. (2023) · Current Psychology · doi:10.1007/s12144-023-04912-7 · Cited by 2
“They may similarly struggle to remain autonomous throughout relationships because of their discomfort around getting too intimately close to another person (Simpson & Rholes, 2017).”
Attachment and Other Emotion‐Based Systemic Approaches
Seedall, R. B., & Sandberg, J. G. (2020) · Wiley eBooks · doi:10.1002/9781119438519.ch17 · Cited by 3
(2018) · Le Journal des psychologues · doi:10.3917/jdp.355.0054 · Cited by 2
Litam, S. D. A. (2024) · Oxford University Press eBooks · doi:10.1093/oso/9780197762677.005.0002 · Cited by 2
How attachment styles predict changes in sexual desire: A study of sexual dynamics in COVID-19
Rehman, U. S., Edwards, J., & McNeil, J. (2022) · The Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality · doi:10.3138/cjhs.2022-0026 · Cited by 1
Basting, E. J., Romero, G. J., Stanley, L. E., Sullivan, J. A., Jensen, M. C., Medenblik, A. M., Garner, A. R., & Stuart, G. L. (2023) · Partner Abuse · doi:10.1891/pa-2022-0040 · Cited by 1
Metadata
- Authors
- Simpson, J. A., & Rholes, W. S.
- Affiliations
- University of Minnesota (US)
- Texas A&M University (US)
- Corresponding author
- Simpson, Jeffry A
- Rholes, W Steven
- Venue
- Current Opinion in Psychology
- Publisher
- Elsevier BV
- Published
- 2017-02
- Volume
- 13
- Pages
- 19-24
- ISSN
- 2352-250X (ISSN-L)
- PMC
- PMC4845754
- OpenAlex
- W2336040666
- Cited by
- 362
- References
- 55
- Citations by year
- 2026: 49 · 2025: 51 · 2024: 67 · 2023: 46 · 2022: 38 · 2021: 40 · 2020: 40 · 2019: 18 · 2018: 10 · 2017: 2
- FWCI
- 1.66
- Type
- journal article
- Language
- en
- Open access
- green
- www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov
- Locations
- Current Opinion in Psychology (publishedVersion)
- PubMed (publishedVersion)
- Europe PMC (PubMed Central) (acceptedVersion)
- PubMed Central (acceptedVersion)
- Funders
- National Institute of Mental Health (R01-MH49599)
- Topics
- Social Sciences › Psychology › Social Psychology › Attachment and Relationship Dynamics
- Social Sciences › Psychology › Experimental and Cognitive Psychology › Anxiety, Depression, Psychometrics, Treatment, Cognitive Processes
- Social Sciences › Psychology › Clinical Psychology › Psychoanalysis and Psychopathology Research
- Keywords
- adult attachment, insecure attachment, romantic relationships, attachment anxiety, attachment avoidance, emotion regulation, stress, diathesis-stress model, chronic stress, acute stress
- MeSH terms
- Adult, Anxiety, Humans, Interpersonal Relations, Love, Models, Psychological, Object Attachment, Stress, Psychological
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