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Parental recall, attachment relating and self‐attacking/self‐reassurance: Their relationship with depression
Abstract
Objectives When things go wrong for people they can become self-critical or focus on positive, reassuring aspects of the self. This study explored the relationship between forms of self-criticism and self-reassurance, recall of parental experiences and attachment style in relation to depressed symptoms in students. Methods A sample of 197 undergraduate students from the UK and Canada completed self-report questionnaires measuring recall of parental styles, attachment, forms of self-criticism, self-reassurance, and depression symptoms. Results Recall of parents as rejecting and overprotecting was significantly related to both inadequacy and self-hating self-criticism. In contrast, parental warmth was negatively correlated with these forms of self-criticism. In addition, when things go wrong for the person, recall of parental warmth was associated with the ability to be self-reassuring. A mediator analysis suggested that (I) the impact of recall of negative parenting on depression is mediated through the forms of self-criticism and (2) the effect of parental warmth on depression was mediated by the ability to be self-reassuring. Conclusions The impacts of negative parenting styles may translate into vulnerabilities to depression via the way children (and later adults) develop their self-to-self relating (e.g. as self-critical versus self-reassuring). Hence, there is a need for further research on the link between attachment experiences, recall of parental rejection/warmth and t…
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“Insecure attachment is associated with parental criticism (Irons et al., 2006).”
From A preliminary investigation of the relationships between attachment insecurity, fear of compassion, and OCD severity (2025) · cites this paper as Irons et al., 2006
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Gilbert, P., & Procter, S. (2006) · Clinical Psychology & Psychotherapy · doi:10.1002/cpp.507 · Cited by 1,822
“They found that self-criticism fully mediated the relationship between parental shaming (verbal abuse) and depression and anxiety; a finding replicated by Irons et al. (2006).”
ResultSelf-citationThe development of compassionate engagement and action scales for self and others
Gilbert, P., Catarino, F., Duarte, C., Matos, M., Kolts, R., Stubbs, J., Ceresatto, L., Duarte, J., Pinto-Gouveia, J., & Basran, J. (2017) · Journal of Compassionate Health Care · doi:10.1186/s40639-017-0033-3 · Cited by 527
“In an early study of 197 students, Irons et al. [62] explored recall of early parenting of rejection vs warmth, in relation to self-criticism and self-reassurance and their impact on depression.”
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“Furthermore, new developments in psychotherapy are beginning to focus on the possibility of training people in self-reassurance and self-compassion with beneficial effects (Gilbert and Irons, 2005; Gilbert and Procter, 2006; Leary et al., 2007; Lutz et al., 2008).”
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Gilbert, P., & Irons, C. (2004) · Memory · doi:10.1080/09658210444000115 · Cited by 251
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“Deficits in self-compassion and self-reassurance have been found to underlie trait selfcriticism and to contribute uniquely to depressive symptoms (Irons et al. 2006; Neff 2003).”
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“In brief, initial evidence suggests that some aspects of parenting received in childhood are associated with self-compassion in adolescents and young adults (Neff & McGeehee, 2010) and with self-criticism in adults (Irons et al., 2006).”
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“As such, it may have been more difficult for them to elicit and receive the compassion from others likely to not only alleviate shame but also instill in them memories of warmth conducive to subsequent self-compassion (Gilbert, 2005 ; Irons, Gilbert, Baldwin, Bacchus, & Palmer, 2006 ).”
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“In the present study, we used combined parental rearing behaviors rather than examiningmother and father separately as in Irons et al. (2006).”
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“Results also showed a positive zero-order association between care-seeking and self-compassion, which is consistent with findings demonstrating a positive relationship between attachment security and self-compassion/ reassurance (Irons et al., 2006; Neff & McGehee, 2010).”
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“The Kassow and Dunst (2004) research synthesis included studies that specifically investigated the manner in which different aspects of caregiver contingent social responsiveness were associated with later secure infant attachment. Kassow and Dunst (2005) conducted a secondary synthesis of a metaanalysis conducted by…”
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“This recommendation is consistent with literature demonstrating the relationship between self-criticism—particularly hostile self-criticism—and depression (Gilbert et al., 2006, 2004; Halamová et al., 2018; Irons et al., 2006).”
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Cognitions as mediators in the relationship between self-compassion and affect
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“Through two distinct comparisons, although not contrary, the self-critical individual devalues and looks down at his/her qualities (Irons et al., 2006).”
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Halamová, J., Kanovský, M., Gilbert, P., Troop, N. A., Zuroff, D. C., Hermanto, N., Petrocchi, N., Sommers‐Spijkerman, M., Kirby, J. N., Shahar, B., et al. (2018) · Journal of Psychopathology and Behavioral Assessment · doi:10.1007/s10862-018-9686-2 · Cited by 86
“In contrast, several studies have also reported that the correlation between the two factors of self-criticism (IS &HS) range between 0.68 and 0.73 (Gilbert et al. 2004; Irons et al. 2006; Kupeli et al. 2013), with one study reporting the correlation as high as 0.81 (Halamová et al. 2017).”
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“Indeed, self-critics also recall their parents as uncaring (Brewin et al., 1992; Campos, Besser, & Blatt, 2010; Irons et al., 2006), critical (Baetens et al., 2013; Brewin et al., 1996), punitive (Quinlan, Blatt, Chevron, & Wein, 1992), cold (Irons et al., 2006), emotionally or verbally (Glassman…”
BackgroundResultInfluentialThe evolutionary roots of psychopathy
da Silva, D. R., Rijo, D., & Salekin, R. T. (2015) · Aggression and Violent Behavior · doi:10.1016/j.avb.2015.01.006 · Cited by 73
“…attachment experiences early in life is also one of the most common causes of psychopathology (e.g., Burnette et al., 2007; Gilbert, 2005, 2010; Irons et al., 2006; Mills et al., 2010; Perry et al., 1995; Schore, 2001, 2009), affects or suppresses compassionate caregiving behavior (Mikulincer…”
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“It is suggested that negative rearing experiences, particularly at the hands of caregivers, might overstimulate the threat-defense system (Gilbert 2005) and/or understimulate the warmth-affiliation system (Irons et al. 2006).”
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“Like self-attacking, reduced selfreassurance (a component of self-compassion) has been associated with a fearful attachment style (Irons et al., 2006) and increased paranoid ideation (Boyd and Gumley, 2007; Mills et al., 2007), as well as increased submission and shame (Gilbert et al., 2010).”
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The Mediating Role of Self-Criticism in the Relationship between Parental Expressed Emotion and NSSI
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“Even though there is strong empirical support for the role of adverse childhood experiences in the vulnerability for development of psychopathology, in general (Ferreira et al., 2012; Gilbert et al., 2003; Irons et al., 2006; Kokoulina & Fernández, 2014; Schore, 2001), and of deliberate self-harm, in particular (Kaes…”
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“…although the literature has presented sound evidence of the link between early negative experiences and the absence of positive experiences in childhood and selfcriticism and depressive symptoms (e.g., Gilbert et al., 2004; Irons et al., 2006), our findings extend these results to adolescence.”
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“In contrast, Irons et al. (2006) demonstrated that the ability to reassure the self is mediated through memories of parental warmth.”
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Self-citationSelf-compassion: An adaptive link between early memories and women’s quality of life
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“…suggesting a link between childhood maltreatment experiences, such as abuse, rejection, criticism, and neglect, and the excessive development of the threat affect regulation system (Dickerson and Kemeny, 2004) and the insufficient stimulation of the affiliative-soothing system (Irons et al., 2006).”
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“High parental rejection, overprotection and low parental warmth predicted low self-compassion (Irons et al., 2006; Pepping et al., 2015; Potter et al., 2014).”
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“Affiliations in which the self is perceived as low rank or emotionally unsupported by key caregivers are believed to contribute to self-critical cognitions, (internal shame), and future expectations of negative evaluation from others (external shame) (Irons, Gilbert, Baldwin, Baccus, & Palmer, 2006 ; Richter, Gilbert,…”
BackgroundResultSelf-criticism and attachment: A systematic review and meta-analysis
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“Specifically, earlier studies have established that CM could lead to self-criticism in adulthood (Irons et al., 2006; Sachs-Ericsson et al., 2006; Wright et al., 2009).”
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“Moreover, self-reassurance has been found to be more highly correlated to depression symptoms than other components of the full scale (Irons et al., 2006).”
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Adult attachment insecurity and dyadic adjustment: The mediating role of self‐criticism
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Gao, Y., Liu, X., Liu, J., & Wang, H. (2023) · Psychology Research and Behavior Management · doi:10.2147/prbm.s417258 · Cited by 16
Parental socialization of emotion and depression in adulthood: The role of attitudes toward sadness
Boucher, M.-È., Lecours, S., Philippe, F. L., & Arseneault, S. (2013) · European Review of Applied Psychology · doi:10.1016/j.erap.2012.11.003 · Cited by 14
Naismith, I., Kerr, S. L., Mwale, A. L., & Feigenbaum, J. (2019) · Clinical Psychologist · doi:10.1111/cp.12180 · Cited by 17
“This reflects findings that low self-compassion and self-reassurance are uniquely predicted by lack of warmth in childhood rather than maltreatment or invalidation (Irons et al. 2006; Kelly & Dupasquier, 2016; Naismith, Zarate-Guerrero & Feigenbaum, 2019; Richter et al., 2009).”
BackgroundSatıcı, S., Uysal, R., & Akin, A. (2015) · Studies in Psychology Estudios de Psicología · doi:10.1080/02109395.2015.1026123 · Cited by 13
Liu, X., Cao, G., Zhang, L., Chen, Y., Liu, S., Shi, Y., Liu, Y., Li, Y., & Yin, H. (2023) · Behavioral Sciences · doi:10.3390/bs13040283 · Cited by 11
The Early Memories of Warmth and Safeness Scale: Dimensionality and Measurement Invariance
Capinha, M., Matos, M., Pereira, M., de Matos, M. A. V., & Rijo, D. (2020) · Journal of Affective Disorders · doi:10.1016/j.jad.2020.11.033 · Cited by 23
Hermanto, N., & Zuroff, D. C. (2017) · The Journal of Positive Psychology · doi:10.1080/17439760.2017.1365162 · Cited by 13
Caldwell, J. M., Meredith, P. J., Whittingham, K., Ziviani, J. M., & Wilson, T. (2023) · Journal of Reproductive and Infant Psychology · doi:10.1080/02646838.2023.2180142 · Cited by 16
“Second, the finding that psychological distress was not significantly correlated with shame, self-blame, attachment styles, or perinatal grief is inconsistent with expectations and with previous research, particularly for the relationship between shame and depression (Irons et al., 2006).”
ResultNorman, D., Correia, H., & Paulik, G. (2020) · Journal of Clinical Psychology · doi:10.1002/jclp.22975 · Cited by 11
Development of a measure for the assessment of peer‐related positive emotional memories
Ferreira, C., Cunha, M., Marta-Simões, J., Duarte, C., Matos, M., & Pinto-Gouveia, J. (2018) · Psychology and psychotherapy · doi:10.1111/papt.12146 · Cited by 10
Defensive Responses to Early Memories with Peers: a Possible Pathway to Disordered Eating
Ferreira, C., Marta-Simões, J., & Trindade, I. A. (2016) · The Spanish Journal of Psychology · doi:10.1017/sjp.2016.45 · Cited by 10
Özdemir, Y., & Sağkal, A. S. (2018) · Psychological Reports · doi:10.1177/0033294118798623 · Cited by 12
“and control are linked with self-criticism (Irons et al., 2006), parental warmth”
BackgroundChen, L., Xu, K., Fu, L., Xu, S., Gao, Q., & Wang, W. (2015) · Bulletin of the Menninger Clinic · doi:10.1521/bumc.2015.79.3.232 · Cited by 9
Seabra, D., Carvalho, S. A., Gato, J., Petrocchi, N., & Salvador, M. D. C. (2024) · Journal of Human Behavior in the Social Environment · doi:10.1080/10911359.2024.2333777 · Cited by 11
“Thus, self-criticism may be a learned behavior stemming from the internalization of others´ critical responses to one´s characteristics perceived as socially undesirable and/or reprehensible (Irons et al., 2006; Koestner et al., 1991).”
Tahirović, S., & Jusic, M. (2016) · doi:10.21533/epiphany.v9i1.211 · Cited by 8
“…warmth is positively D O I: 10 .2 15 33 /e pi ph an y. v9 i1 .2 11 S. Tahirović Epiphany: Journal of Transdisciplinary Studies, Vol. 9, No. 1, (2016) © Faculty of Arts and Social Sciences associated with ability to be self-reassuring and self-soothing in stressful situation (Irons et al, 2006).”
BackgroundAsian-American College Students' Parental Attachment and Their Relationship with God
Shin, H. (2009) · Christian Education Journal Research on Educational Ministry · doi:10.1177/073989130900600212 · Cited by 8
Carvalho, C. B., Teixeira, M., Costa, R., Cordeiro, F., & Cabral, J. M. (2023) · Journal of Youth and Adolescence · doi:10.1007/s10964-023-01777-8 · Cited by 9
“Indeed, the recall of parental warmth is positively linked with the ability to be self-reassuring and self-soothing in stressful situations (Irons et al., 2006), an adaptive emotion regulation process (Marta-Simões et al., 2017).”
BackgroundSassaroli, S., Caselli, G., Mansueto, G., Palmieri, S., Pepe, A., Veronese, G., & Ruggiero, G. M. (2021) · Journal of Rational-Emotive & Cognitive-Behavior Therapy · doi:10.1007/s10942-021-00421-3 · Cited by 7
“The third cluster primarily concerns shame and guilt (Brewin et al., 1992; Huprich, 2003; Irons et al., 2006; Kawamura et al., 2001; Vieth & Trull, 1999), linked to a life theme of feeling unworthy/inadequate, where there is a severely critical, controlling and oppressive relational style and…”
BackgroundBellur, Z., Alpay, E. H., & Aydin, A. (2023) · Current Psychology · doi:10.1007/s12144-021-01408-0 · Cited by 7
Parenting Among Mothers With Bipolar Disorder: Children's Perspectives
Venkataraman, M. (2011) · Journal of Family Social Work · doi:10.1080/10522158.2011.553781 · Cited by 7
“Insecure attachment between mother and child is another problem in parenting that can increase risk of academic, behavioral, and emotional problems in children (Irons, Gilbert, Baldwin, Baccus, & Palmer, 2006 ; Perry, 2009 ).”
BackgroundHalamová, J., Koróniová, J., & Baránková, M. (2019) · The Qualitative Report · doi:10.46743/2160-3715/2019.3891 · Cited by 8
Perceived Parenting Style and Adolescent Self-Compassion: A Longitudinal, Within-Person Approach
Kaufmann, S., Ciarrochi, J., Yap, K., & Fraser, M. I. (2023) · Mindfulness · doi:10.1007/s12671-023-02232-2 · Cited by 10
“…a study that explored attachment experiences, self-criticism, and self-reassurance found that recall of parental rejection and overprotection was associated with higher self-criticism, and recall of parental warmth was associated with self-reassurance in times of distress (Irons et al., 2006).”
Non-suicidal self-injury in a college sample: Intrapersonal and family factors
Tseng, Y. C., & Ditchman, N. (2023) · Journal of American College Health · doi:10.1080/07448481.2023.2209206 · Cited by 8
“32,39,63,64 Although typically less cited, such results highlight the importance of previous findings 65 that self-criticism plays a role in the risk for psychopathology and underscore the importance of extending this to include self-harming behaviors, such as NSSI.”
Bonduelle, S. L. B., Chen, Q., Wu, G., Braet, C., Raedt, R. D., & Baeken, C. (2021) · Frontiers in Psychiatry · doi:10.3389/fpsyt.2021.673805 · Cited by 7
Dragan, N., Kamptner, L., & Riggs, M. L. (2021) · Mindfulness · doi:10.1007/s12671-021-01634-4 · Cited by 9
“…and remain in the present moment (Baer et al. 2006), internalize caregiver responsiveness and be kind to themselves in difficult situations (Irons et al. 2006; Mikulincer and Shaver 2004), and perceive similarities between themselves and others regardless of their emotional state…”
BackgroundCook, S., Pruessner, J. C., LUPIEN, S. J., & Juster, R. (2018) · Psychology and Sexuality · doi:10.1080/19419899.2018.1470105 · Cited by 7
Ferreira, C., Oliveira, S., & Mendes, A. L. (2017) · The Spanish Journal of Psychology · doi:10.1017/sjp.2017.50 · Cited by 6
Mendes, A. L., Canavarro, M. C., & Ferreira, C. (2022) · Appetite · doi:10.1016/j.appet.2021.105715 · Cited by 5
Metadata
- Authors
- Irons, C., Gilbert, P., Baldwin, M. W., Baccus, J. R., & Palmer, M.
- Corresponding author
- Gilbert, P.
- ORCID
- Venue
- British Journal of Clinical Psychology
- Publisher
- Wiley
- Published
- 2006-09
- Volume
- 45
- Issue
- 3
- Pages
- 297-308
- ISSN
- 0144-6657 (ISSN-L)
- 2044-8260
- OpenAlex
- W2161353780
- Cited by
- 176
- References
- 0
- Citations by year
- 2026: 2 · 2025: 2 · 2024: 4 · 2023: 15 · 2022: 10 · 2021: 21 · 2020: 9 · 2019: 11 · 2018: 8 · 2017: 12 · 2016: 18 · 2015: 13 · 2014: 10 · 2013: 9 · 2012: 10
- FWCI
- 3.87
- Type
- journal article
- Language
- en
- Open access
- closed
- Locations
- British Journal of Clinical Psychology (publishedVersion)
- PubMed (publishedVersion)
- Topics
- Social Sciences › Psychology › Social Psychology › Attachment and Relationship Dynamics
- Social Sciences › Psychology › Experimental and Cognitive Psychology › Anxiety, Depression, Psychometrics, Treatment, Cognitive Processes
- Social Sciences › Psychology › Developmental and Educational Psychology › Identity, Memory, and Therapy
- Keywords
- parental recall, attachment styles, self-criticism, self-reassurance, depressive symptoms, parental rejection, parental warmth, parental overprotection, undergraduate students, mediation
- MeSH terms
- Adult, Affect, Child, Child Rearing, Depressive Disorder, Female, Humans, Internal-External Control, Male, Object Attachment, Personality Inventory, Surveys and Questionnaires, Mental Recall, Rejection, Psychology, Risk Factors, Self Care, Self Concept, Parenting
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