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More than words: Reframing compliments from romantic partners fosters security in low self-esteem individuals.

Marigold, Denise C., Holmes, John G., Ross, Michael·2007·Journal of Personality and Social Psychology

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Abstract

Although people with low self-esteem (LSEs) doubt their value to their romantic partners, they tend to resist positive feedback from their partners. This resistance undermines their relationships and has been difficult to overcome in past research. The authors investigated whether LSEs could be induced to take their partners' kind words to heart by manipulating how abstractly they described a recent compliment. In 3 studies, LSEs felt more positively about the compliments, about themselves, and about their relationships--as positively as people with high self-esteem (HSEs) felt--when they were encouraged to describe the meaning and significance of the compliments. The effects of this abstract meaning manipulation were still evident 2 weeks later. Thus, when prompted, LSEs can reframe affirmations from their partners to be as meaningful as HSEs generally believe them to be and, consequently, can feel just as secure and satisfied with their romantic relationships.

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“For example, unlike LSEs who feel insecure after receiving a compliment, HSEs benefit from receiving compliments and social support as it validates and bolsters their positive self-views (Lee and Way, 2019; Marigold et al., 2007).”
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Authors: Marigold, D. C., Holmes, J. G., & Ross, M.
Affiliations: University of Waterloo (CA)
ORCID: Marigold, Denise C.
Venue: Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
Publisher: American Psychological Association (APA)
Published: 2007-02
Volume: 92
Issue: 2
Pages: 232-248
ISSN: 0022-3514 (ISSN-L)
1939-1315
DOI: 10.1037/0022-3514.92.2.232
OpenAlex: W2054611531
Cited by: 155
References: 60
Citations by year: 2026: 1 · 2025: 7 · 2024: 4 · 2023: 10 · 2022: 3 · 2021: 5 · 2020: 14 · 2019: 12 · 2018: 8 · 2017: 12 · 2016: 8 · 2015: 12 · 2014: 13 · 2013: 6 · 2012: 6
FWCI: 11.44
Type: journal article
Language: en
Open access: closed
Locations: Journal of Personality and Social Psychology (publishedVersion)
PubMed (publishedVersion)
Funders: Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council
Topics: Social Sciences › Psychology › Social Psychology › Attachment and Relationship Dynamics
Social Sciences › Psychology › Clinical Psychology › Personality Traits and Psychology
Social Sciences › Psychology › Social Psychology › Death Anxiety and Social Exclusion
Keywords: low self-esteem, romantic relationships, compliments, positive feedback, reframing, abstract meaning, relationship satisfaction, self-concept
MeSH terms: Adaptation, Psychological, Adult, Courtship, Female, Happiness, Humans, Male, Ontario, Mental Recall, Regression Analysis, Reinforcement, Social, Self Concept, Social Perception, Time Factors

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More than words: Reframing compliments from romantic partners fosters security in low self-esteem individuals.

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